NEWTOWN, PA- Dan Koloski, principal shareholder of Koloski Industries, believes he has found a way to put lightning in a bottle. Koloski feels confident that he has discovered a way to replicate and reproduce the phenomenon which is “Old Man Strength”. Throughout history, there has been much speculation but no one has ever been able to explain the mystery of old man strength. Koloski aims to change that.
Dan says, “We have very little science to explain why, when compared to the overall strength and agility of young men between the ages of 15-30, the men within the 55-70 age group fall short in almost every quantifiable category. However, when it involves the need to jerk someone by the collar, sternly finger jab a young man in the chest, muscle loose an over-torqued nut with a wrench, or dislodge a hideaway couch that is jammed into a moving truck leaving for college, there is no more efficient source of energy than old man strength.”
Koloski went on to say, “Most of us have tried to unsuccessfully test the old man at least once in our life. I have devoted my life to trying to figure out what it is about an old man with hairy forearms and a hunched back which harnesses such an indomitable power. It’s almost as if there is a pheromone being released which gives warning to the younger men around them which says, ‘Don’t fuck with the geezer, that old man will ruin your day with nothing but grip strength and a powerful push-pull.’”
One of the things that makes old man strength so intriguing is that it seems to be blind to conditioning or athletic prowess. It is not something you work towards strengthening. You don’t build it in a gym or with a trainer. Old man strength is just bestowed upon you, same as back hair or an oversized naval.
Koloski tells us, “Right now, the problem with old man strength is gaining access to it. It seems to be something that can only be reached when necessary. Science can’t explain why a man can hardly stand up out of his living room chair in one instance but if you steal his chicken wings, that same man can fling a person half his age and twice his strength through a wall of sheetrock.”
Koloski believes that old man strength is the energy source of the future.