Foul Play: Lady Claims She Was Unprepared For Photographer at 5k

NORFOLK, VA.- Melisa Burgess likes to run 5k’s. Touting herself as a veteran of the sport she knows a thing or two about how to run a race. However, it seems that she was not prepared for the curveball that was sent her direction during the Fishsticks for Fragile Emotions 5k this past weekend when she was apparently unaware of the location of the race photographer.

We tracked down Melissa so that we could hear her side of the story. Melissa claims, “I have run 100 of these stupid races. They are all the same. Someone is trying to raise money to feed the rainforest, liberate BillyGoats, adopt elephants or some bullshit like that.”

Melissa went on to say, “Everybody knows that there are only three times that you are expected to run during a race:
1. The start
2. The finish
3. Whenever there is a cameraman

According to Melissa, the problem is that the cameraman was located somewhere other than what was indicated in the pre-race email, thereby leaving her unprepared for the photo

Melissa says, “I want my money back. If I don’t have a running photo to post on FB, then there is no reason to even run the damn race- it’s not like I give a shit about Salmon with Dyslexia or whatever the hell they are raising money for. Here I was, strolling along- drinking a Slurpee that I bought from the gas station and eating a Ho-Ho that I had stuffed in my sports bra- when I hear the click of the camera. I told the cameraman that I wanted to re-do the pic at full-sprint but he said that he didn’t have enough film.”

Melissa, still appalled at the incident, concluded by saying, “Let’s be realistic, you don’t really think people run these entire races do you? If you aren’t forewarned about the location of the photographer, the odds of getting a running pic are not very good. And if you don’t have a pic to post on social media, there is no real benefit to any of it. Everyone loses.”