LOUSVILLE, KY.- Never Forget, Inc. has released an app to go alongside your Garmin or MyFitnessPal app which allows you to take personal shots at your ex-lover while giving you the comfort of plausible deniability.
There is finally an app for athletes whose life is in the crapper and they desperately want the world to believe that they have moved on with their lives. Shove It Up Your Motivator takes insults that you would like to direct towards your ex-lover and disguises the personal attacks behind pictures of majestic mountains, tranquil seas, and beautiful sunsets.
The app will also automatically remove any rest time or periods of walking so that you will appear to have improved your fitness-demonstrating that you are no longer the big, lazy turd which caused your significant other to leave you in the first place.
If you have ever wanted to have your life collapse while throwing punches at your ex and convincing the world that you have persevered, Shove It Up Your Motivator has thousands of hateful yet motivational memes ready to launch as soon as the shit hits the fan.
“When life gives you lemons and a whore, open a brothel that sells lemonade.”
“Be better than yesterday…and more faithful than that cheating piece of garbage who is no longer in your life.”
Show the world that you live in a spiritual world of love and bliss while letting your ex know that you hope they die a slow and painful death.